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The Great Troll War

Электронная книга - «The Great Troll War». Краткое содержание книги:

The final instalment of the Last Dragonslayer Chronicles, demonstrating that with a small band of committed followers, a large tin of resolve and steely determination, almost anything can be achieved . . . Sixteen-year-old Jennifer Strange and her sidekick and fellow Orphan Tiger Prawns have been driven to the tip of the UnUnited Kingdoms - Cornwall - by the invasion of the Trolls. Their one defence is a six-foot-wide trench full of buttons, something which the Trolls find unaccountably terrifying (it's their clickiness). Worse than being eaten by Trolls is the prospect of the Mighty Shandar requisitioning the Quarkbeast and using him to achieve supreme power and domination - an ambition that has been four hundred years in the planning and which will ultimately leave the Earth a cold cinder, devoid of all life. Nothing has ever looked so bleak, but Jennifer, assisted by a renegade vegan Troll, a bunch of misfit sorcerers, the Princess (or is she now the ruler?) of the UnUnited (or are they now United?) Kingdoms, and Tiger, must find a way to vanquish the most powerful wizard the world has ever seen, and along the way discover the truth about her parents, herself, and what is in the locked glovebox of her VW Beetle . . .
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Breaking the Spaniel Barrier

39

Whether they meant in general or just Subterrain-specific, I never did quite find out.

Inside Shandar’s Tower

40

Bergerac wasn’t there. I checked.

41

Homing snails are technically Helix velocitas pomatia, and are both male and female, hence the ‘they’ and ‘them’ pronouns. I could have written ‘it’ but that would be disrespectful.

42

You need to look this guy up.

43

As you might imagine, ‘ectomy’ is a medical term relating to the removal of something, in the case of ‘Soulectomy’, a soul. The word can also apply to tonsils (tonsilectomy) or bone (ostectomy).

Wedding bells

44

She was previously a scruffy solicitor who was fired for sloppy property conveyancing.

Kevin sees it all

45

I’m still not referring to Sir Matt Grifflon as ‘King’.

The Worriers

46

From the Italian slang for a group of people who constantly worry. Pronounced: ‘fret-a-rar-tee’.

47

Granting ‘dodgy pardons’ for cash was the sole form of income for the diminutive duchy, along with jam-making, and exorbitant tolls on a 126-foot stretch of the Kennet and Avon canal.

48

It is actually a lot more complicated than this, as the methane is mixed with pure oxygen and hydrogen, which is generated in a gland above the Dragon’s throat. The resultant mix, sustained for long enough, will indeed melt armour – yet if controlled precisely and directed at a frying pan, can be used to make a very refreshing omelette.

49

Cloud Leviathans, Australopithecines, Ralph and Evolutionary Master Resets are all fully explained in The Eye of Zoltar.

50

The British Thermal Unit. Simply put, just how much energy would it take to carbonise a human? It’s only of relevance to fire-breathing Dragons. I don’t know where he went to get the figure.

Cloud Leviathan

51

A single average-sized Angel’s Feather has an uplift of two pounds, just under that of the average house brick. You can find out more about the uplifting power of Angel’s Feathers in The Eye of Zoltar.

The One True Monarch

52

Spanish for ‘The Charisma’. Unlike ‘La Calienta’ (hot) or ‘Las Llamas’ (The Llamas), which are all well known, ‘El Carisma’ has only been mastered by three known princesses. No one knows why they are all named in Spanish.

Humans v. Trolls

53

Molly, the fifteenth, was with us. She never did go home.

54

It’s the nearest star to ours, about 4.2 light-years away. If Shandar was planning on getting there in thirty-seven years, he was going to have to circumvent some pretty big physical laws.

55

This is a geeky in-joke reference to early Volkswagens. You can safely ignore it.

We say goodbye

56

A ‘transfer gearbox’ is the secondary gearbox that engages four-wheel drive and lowers the gearing ratio.

Jupiter and Beyond

57

‘Going nova’: an exploding star. Shandar’s idea of a firework display. I don’t suppose he cared whether that sun was home to a friendly system of planets.

58

Named after the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel, this salad is made of apple, celery, walnuts and grapes on a bed of lettuce, liberally drizzled with mayonnaise.

Have you read the rest of The Last Dragonslayer series?

 

 

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Want more from Jasper Fforde?

 

 

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